oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
