I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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