he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
