Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
