You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
