i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
