I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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