Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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