Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
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