I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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