Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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