I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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