Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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