I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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