8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize