From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize