break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
