No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
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Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
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Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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