your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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