the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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