When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
