Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize