Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.