It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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