No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize