morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
