therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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