The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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