Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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