did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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