Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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