Do you still have your period?
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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