Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
