Can i not drive my cunt home
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
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