You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
kristin has been a bad kristin
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
