drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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