Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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