how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
