I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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