She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize