So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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