4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I think I just shit out all my problems.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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