when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize