I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize