You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
