I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
pop tarts are not kleenex
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
