i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
