Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
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I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
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The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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