And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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