He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
