"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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