I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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